A Poem by Bianca Bagos
November 30, 2015

“In The Waiting Line”


*Urbanyogi recommends listening to this track while reading this entry


if i could read right through your eyes,
this is what it would say:

that your heart is gentle and kind to everyone around you
that if you could save the world
from all the pain that it carries
on its shoulders, you would –
realistically speaking,
the world means everyone who enters your life
so maybe, that’s still good enough

that romance is an idea that you were always fascinated by,
but you never allowed
yourself to fully grasp the concept of it,
because it means having to separate yourself from reality,
which, under the terms of your own home,
proves itself to be unacceptable
so for now, it stems from nothing but just
a concept from a book,
an ingredient to make life more interesting
but isn’t really necessary
for you, love is simple
it’s a gift that’s meant to be shared
that giving it will entail happiness
without asking for anything in return
joy through selflessness

your unwavering faith has been
one of the highlights of your character,
and it hasn’t been easy to hold firmly to the context of it,
but then again, you refuse to let other practices replace the building blocks of what you genuinely believe is true

you have morals that are standard,
fixed, and down to the final detail of it,
exact, and you let nothing, let alone, anyone,
shatter your fine principles that as to how you live your life

you have the most fascinating stories to share
you remember every single detail of it,
like the places you’ve crossed off your bucket list,
stories you’ve read from books,
told to you by strangers
experiences that allowed you to hoist up walls in order to protect you and make you feel less
you’ve set that aside, for safe keeping,
saved only for someone worthy enough
to hear what you have to say

you’ve been a very diligent listener,
hearing out everyone else’s problems,
of what they have to say,
but no one ever asks,
how you are and how you’ve been lately
and that’s okay, you’ve accepted that’s how it is
and if the people around you just think that you’re simply
the quiet one on the corner who only listens and doesn’t say much,
‘alone’, ‘cliche’ and ‘predictable’
you allow them to think that way,
because that’s just how you are
silence has always been your safety net
and solitude has always been your source of refuge
so for you, alone is okay, cliche is acceptable
and predictable is fine
what burdens you most is that you want to cut the strings
that pull you back from what you want to do out of life,
but you’re not the type who’s going to make the risk of doing so,
maybe not now, not just yet,
you’re fine where you are, and will be patient,
you understand the value of waiting,
it will take a while before you’re finally set to sail.

if only, if only someone would understand what your mouth can’t speak but your eyes can say,
of this simple silent wish you ask for,
for someone who will enter your life
and not be burdened by your thoughts,
and instead, be fascinated by it